We Must Choose Others Over Self – Part 2

29 Aug We Must Choose Others Over Self – Part 2

Blog Series

Moving from Checkers to Chess

Five Steps to Unleashing the Power of an Eternal Perspective

Servant Leadership

Last week, in part 1 of choosing others over self, we made the case for the fact that love gives, and that if we are going to love others, it means we must “give” to them, not “take” from them.

This week, in part 2 of choosing others over self, we make the case that the Christian life also involves servant leadership. The key Scripture for this is Mark 10:44-45, “Whoever wants to be first among you shall be a slave to all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.”

Of course, this is a very broad scope that can seem overwhelming at first. There are millions of people with millions of needs, many of which we cannot meet. But it helps to understand that it is a mindset. We look to serve others rather than trying to get others to serve us.

We cannot meet everyone’s needs, but we can meet some

We can demonstrate servanthood by giving what we can to help meet the needs of others. Having said that, we cannot meet everyone’s needs.

Even Jesus admitted that the poor would always be with us. If we gave away all our money, we would not make a dent in poverty, and our own families would starve. If we spent 100% of our time serving others, we would soon dry up. Even Jesus rested. Nevertheless, we are to help others in need when it lies within our power to do so.

In the parable of the Good Samaritan, we learn four principles for deciding when to help others.

1. When someone comes across our path in the normal living of life.
2. They have a true need (not just a desire) that they cannot meet by themselves.
3. Meeting the need would not enable dysfunction.
4. We have the resources to meet the need (time, talent, and treasure).

 If we come across someone who meets those criteria, we have the opportunity to meet their need(s).

The parable of the Good Samaritan focuses on a physical need, but the principle goes beyond physical needs to any needs. Someone might need non-physical help: spiritual, emotional, psychological, etc. When assessing these needs, the same principles apply. If a person comes across our path who has a true need, and we have the resources to meet that need, then we are to meet it.

Servant leadership is a mindset

There are many ways we can serve others that do not take significant time, talent or treasure, and opening ourselves up to that mindset can dramatically increase our impact on others.

As we cultivate a servant mindset toward others, here are three things we can to demonstrate servant leadership to others.

1. We can set a good example.

Setting a good example for others is one of the most powerful ways we can exhibit servant leadership. There are few things more powerful than a good example. Even today, but especially when I was a young Christian, when I saw someone whom I admired, something deep down inside me said, “I want to be like him/her.”

Albert Einstein once said, “Example isn’t another way to teach, it is the only way to teach.”

Perhaps the greatest of all influence, parents upon children, is based on the power of example.

In an additional example in Scripture, Paul wrote, “…you know what kind of men we proved to be among you for your sakes. You also became imitators of us and of the Lord… so that you became an example to all the believers in Macedonia and Achaia”  (1 Thessalonians 1:5-7).

Then, the Macedonians and Achaians’ example, in verse 8, went to “every place the news of your faith toward God has gone out.”

In this we see these generations of the impact of example: Paul’s example influenced the Thessalonians, and the Thessalonians’ example influenced the Macedonians and Achaians, their example influenced people everywhere the news of their faith was shared.

This is so expected, it’s easy for us to go “Yaddah, yaddah, yaddah!  Let’s get to something more interesting.”

But just stop a minute. Have you ever made the decision that you are going to be a good example to others? If you haven’t, you have not yet accepted the greatest challenge – and the greatest opportunity – you have in life to exercise servant leadership.

2. We can encourage others:

Proverbs 25:11 says, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver” (ESV)

It is as poet Maya Angelou once said, “I’ve leaned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Chuck Swindoll said, “Encouragement is awesome. It can actually change the course of another person’s day, week, or life!”

To adopt the habit of encouraging others is to greatly multiply the impact we can have in others’ lives, and increase our influence as servant leaders.

3. We can compliment others:

Encouragement is a general category. But there are other more specific things we can do that are, indeed, encouraging, but which are important to single out. One of these is to compliment others.

Mark Twain once said.  “I can last two months on a good compliment.”  And can’t we all?!?

Here are a dozen examples of compliments that we can use in everyday conversations that, when spoken in sincerity, can make a valuable contribution to others’ lives:

• • You look nice.
  • Well done.
  • That was clever.
  • This is terrific.
  • You are really good at that.
  • You should be proud of yourself.
  • You really made a difference.
  • I wouldn’t have thought of that.
  • That was funny.
  • I appreciate what you said/did.
  • You handled that well.
  • I always enjoy what you have to say.

In my earlier years, I didn’t have the ego strength, the self-confidence to compliment others. I was so insecure and starved for affirmation myself, I was unable to affirm others. As I began to heal and gain strength from God’s love for me, I have become able to adopt a lifestyle of complimenting others. I’m still not as good as I want to be, but if it helps others as much as it helped me, I think it can become a game-changing ministry for me.

Conclusion

We all long for meaningful relationships. It’s how God has made us. But, as we saw last week, we cannot “get” by “taking.” We cannot get a good relationship with others by taking from them what we want. That doesn’t work. If it did, we would have a world of happy predators. The reality is, to have rich and rewarding relationships, we must choose the (seemingly) undesirable: we must choose others over self, and understand that love gives. As we live that out, we “get” by “giving.”

This week, we see that as we serve others (which is a form of “giving”), we have a profound influence on them, helping them be more successful in life, and gratifying us in the process.

Next week, we’ll look at the third thing we must do in choosing the undesirable: we must choose the eventual over the immediate. I’ll see you then!

Get a Moving from Checkers to Chess At-a-Glance-Overview: Click Here

As we have been studying these concepts for quite some time (including in some prior blog series), and I am excited to now be connecting all the “moving parts” from those posts and combining them into a “spiritual game plan” in this “Moving from Checkers to Chess ~ 5 Steps to Unleashing the Power of an Eternal Perspective” series.

For an overview of the game plan, so you can see at a glance where we begin and where we’re headed, I’ve created an overview/outline you can download for free: Click Here

For the full discussion of each of the steps, begin with the first post in this series, Moving from Checkers to Chess, and then continue with the following posts thereafter.

In case you’re new here, below are two resources I’ve created for additional help in your Christian discipleship journey:

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